Many of us, because of our busy schedules, complain about too little time with our spouses or partners. Here's a typical day: dealing with the hectic morning routine, getting the kids off to school, a quick peck on the cheek, traffic-filled commute to the office, a long, stressful work day, rush hour commute home, hectic dinner/bathtime routine, off to the computer to check email/pay bills, and then collapsing, exhausted, into bed. Days like this are why some of us feel the need to schedule in dedicated 'date nights' to get in some quality time with our significant others.
我们很多人因为繁忙的日程，而抱怨和配偶或伴侣呆在一起的时间太少。我们典型的一天是这样的：早晨起来要应付例行的一大堆事情，催促孩子去上学，匆匆地化个妆，在拥挤的车流中开车去上班，一个漫长而紧张的工作日，在高峰时段开车回家，忙碌的晚餐、洗澡，打开电脑查电子邮件、付帐单，然后浑身散架一般、疲惫不堪地倒到床上去睡觉。正是因为这样的日子，我们有些人感觉有必要安排专门的“约会夜”、和我们重要的另一半共享一段美好时光。
But some couples can face the opposite problem, too much togetherness, as my colleague Elizabeth Bernstein writes about in her Bonds column. Of course, retirees and empty-nesters have long dealt with such adages as 'half as much money─and twice as much spouse.' Couples who work together or who both work from home also face potential togetherness overload. But now, thanks to the recession and the millions of layoffs it has spurred, many younger couples far from retirement age are discovering that being together 24/7 can be a recipe for disaster. When one spouse (or both) stops working, the impact on the relationship can be profound.
但一些夫妇面临的问题可能刚好相反，他们在一起的时间太多了。我的同事伯恩斯坦(Elizabeth Bernstein)就在自己的专栏中提到过这种情况。当然了，退休人员和空巢者早就有了“收入减半、老伴加倍”这类的说法。为同一家公司工作或是都在家工作的夫妇也可能会有在一起的时间太多的问题。但现在，由于经济衰退和由此引发的裁员大潮，许多远远没有到退休年龄的年轻夫妇也发现，一天到晚待在一块儿也会成为灾难的源头。当两个人中的一方（或双方）停止工作时，会对两个人的关系产生深远的影响。
Layoffs, of course, bring their own stresses, such as financial worries and a loss of professional identity, which can only exacerbate even the strongest of relationships. When money is tight, couples─many of whom plan their lives around two incomes─often argue, blaming each other for things such as poor career management, insufficiently rigorous job hunting or overspending, Ms. Bernstein writes. Couples must contend with new routines to their days─or a disorienting lack of structure. Even when couples are supportive of each other, sitting home all day without a job can cause even the most respectful couples to go stir crazy and become needy.
当然，遭遇裁员本身也会造成压力，比如说财务方面的担忧以及专业身份的丧失，即使是最牢固的关系也会因此而受到影响。伯恩斯坦说，一旦缺钱时，两口子（许多人都是按照两份收入来计划生活的）常常会吵架，指责对方不善于进行职业规划、找工作不够积极或是花钱太多。两个人必须应对生活中新出现的种种事情，或是缺乏条理、让人摸不着头脑的状况。即使两个人互相支持，成天坐在家里没事干也会令最互敬互爱的夫妇失去理智、变得斤斤计较。